BJJ Saarbrücken: EGO The Biggest Killer in Jiu Jitsu

 

This article was written by Black Belt Rubens Cobrinha

Leave your ego at the door….you’ve probably heard that expression before in various BJJ academies but what does it really mean? Why is it so important in the development of your game to roll with humility? Let’s get real: Ego is one of the hardest things to overcome on the mat. Our natural instinct as humans is to survive and in Jiu-Jitsu every roll will put that theory to the test. The problem usually occurs when that instinct kicks in and we suddenly find ourselves relying on strength instead of technique for our own self- preservation. The result usually ends with someone getting hurt or discouraged from training, whether it be you or your partner. As a white belt, you act like a sponge and absorb everything you can to better yourself as a student. However, it is pretty common that once a practitioner is promoted to blue belt, their ego kicks in. This is because the mentality once promoted is often ‘I can’t get tapped out by a white belt.’ It only becomes more of a problem when you reach purple. Many practitioners reach Black Belt and this ego that controls their attitude on the mat stops them from ever growing in BJJ. Their ego disables their willingness to learn.

Contrary to popular belief, Jiu-Jitsu is not about winning or losing. It’s quite common to see strong, large practitioners become completely frustrated when they are getting submitted by guys who are 100lbs lighter than they are or by female practitioners. They leave then gym in disbelief that they LOST and didn’t WIN. Their ego is obviously the cause of this. You’ve heard the old saying “you must lose to win,” and nowhere is that more apparent that in BJJ. When you stop focusing on WINNING or LOSING, and start to see training as LEARNING, that’s when your game will begin to improve. EGO WILL KILL YOU ON THE MAT. It’s such a shame when purple belts get tapped by a white belt and then slow down their training or never roll with that student for fear of losing. Remember, it’s not about a win or loss. Your frame of mind when you train is everything. If you are rolling to WIN or LOSE, then you won’t allow any room to LEARN, which is really the objective of all your time spent on the mat. Besides, winning or losing is a state of mind. If you are a black belt, and you roll against Marcelo Garcia and get tapped out, it is an opportunity for you to learn and the experience itself should be a ‘win.’

It’s perfectly okay to tap. In fact, every time you tap out you learn. Humility goes much deeper than just tapping too. It should pervade every interaction on the mat, communicating respect, a healthy self-esteem, and a willingness to defer to others. High level practitioners who aren’t afraid to tap out to lower ranking students demonstrate that humility is not only the bigger choice, it is also the path to improvement. You may say it’s easier for a high-level practitioner to demonstrate humility. However, it doesn’t get easier or more enjoyable. It just becomes something you get more used to – you become comfortable with the discomfort of wishing you were better, worrying about what other people think and whether your efforts are going to pay off, and sometimes feeling ornery and uncooperative. Tapping out is not the only way to leave your ego at the door. There are many high-level competitors who will train with higher ranking students who are NOT competitors and feel the need to make their roll extremely difficult. For example, if you are a young, blue belt competitor and are rolling with a much older, brown belt student who does not actively compete, it should not be necessary to feel the need to smash them because they are higher ranked. They may only train 2 hours, three times a week and you might be training 7 hours a day, 7 days a week. In this situation….what are you trying to prove?

Here are some examples of taking your ego with you on the mat:

You refuse to tap.

You train angrily like you are out to ‘destroy.’

You argue with your instructor for any reason.

You keep score of how many times you tap and have been tapped.

You have and offer opinion on when you think you should be promoted.

You roll at 100% even when you are training with older or lower ranking students.

We’re all human and it can be extremely difficult to put your ego aside whether it’s your first class or you’ve been promoted to black belt. However, bottom line is that there is no other way to better your game in BJJ and life in general. If you are not willing to fail, then you are not willing to succeed.

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